Alas, alack, what a pain in the ass

Well fellow cats and critters, I’ve been really busy the last few days. Exploring every room in this new house. Sniffing all the new sniffs. The other day I sat with BigKitty on our new deck. She still doesn’t let me go out on my own. Says there are two many cars on the street in front of our house. I’m not sure what she’s talking about – she may just be making it up. She’s got all kinds of rules: don’t sit on the kitchen counter; don’t eat out the dish she’s eating from; poop in the litter pan, not outside of it; stay out of the kitchen cabinets. Blah blah blah. So many rules – I just ignore them when she’s not here. I have suffered the ill effects of my adventuring though. I’m embarrassed to admit it – and I’m not telling you or BigKitty how this happened – but, I broke my tail. Yep, cracked the ol’ tail. ‘Bout midway down. Nah, doesn’t actually hurt all that much – unless BigKitty or somebody else touches it – but I can’t really hold it up. It’s all droopy. BigKitty says my tail is at half mast. She also keeps calling me “wonky tail.” She's the real pain in the ass. I can still move the tip, but moving it at all makes it hurt. The vet (hate the vet) says it’ll heal up, but I might have a permanent kink in my tail. Hope it doesn’t spoil my good looks. In the meantime, it doesn’t give me much trouble, but sitting down is difficult. I get about halfway down and the tail won’t flex quite right. Fortunately BigKitty elevated my food dishes so I can eat standing. Come to think of it, maybe I can work this for some extra food.